This is an interview with a friend of mine. She is a very attractive, and my scale of 1-9, she is definitly an 8. We met when I was experimenting with online dating sites, and she is one of the people I ended up meeting. She had a very interesting and to the point profile. It was not overly funny, and yet it was not overly serious. I guess you would say it was a mix of the two. I will say her pictures did attract my eye to. I messaged her and we began to talk. From the beginning we hit it off pretty well. Actually I would say very well. We spoke on the site for about an hour itself. After that we moved to a messenger service for a short time, and finally onto the phone. Overall we spent probably 6 hours of conversation that day. During the conversation on the phone she explained to me she was in an open relationship. At this point I hesitated a bit, but as I have expressed in other blogs there was honesty. Her boyfriend knew about the situation and it was an agreement with them. She was honest with me so everything was ok on my side. We met up a week later (which is the main discussion of this article) and we have remained very close friends ever since. For the sake of the interview I will call her FantasyWritter.
WolfyStyles: What was it about the first message I sent you on the dating site that caused you to choose to message me back?
FantasyWriter: Overall, what convinced me to message you back was the fact that your message was BY FAR the most amusing thing I’d read in a long while (though I guarantee I can’t tell you exact phrases without looking back at it) and your final comment of: “Hope you appreciate satire. I work hard on it, and I had to take a shot and message you “you miss 100% of the shots you don’t take”.” So I chose to take a shot in the dark in return. Certainly couldn’t hurt.
WolfyStyles: I am sure you get a lot of messages that are lame and bad, what set mine apart?
FantasyWriter: Certainly the first thing that got my attention was the all capital letters in the subject that said, MEOW. This is something my friends and I would say to one another when we were bored or in greeting (yes, we’re odd people, get over it). Your first comment of: “Either your in some form of witness protection program and hiding from creepy exs or your using that name to hide from the police” made me laugh as well. You kind of made the whole dating site thing a joke (as well as the people on it), which automatically made me relax.
WolfyStyles: Can you give an example of one of the worst ones you received?
FantasyWriter: Would you care to chat sometime? 
I’m Brad by the way. Nice to meet your acquaintance!” Any message that used incorrect grammar/spelling instantly made me wince. Also, that one was very short and my mental response was along the lines of, “…Ok… moving on…” There was also a chat I had with an 18-year-old who I knew wanted to sleep with me. After he danced around the question for a bit, he finally asked me if I was interested. I told him, “Sorry but no.” His response was, “its cool i just wanted to fuck you you aint tht good lookin anyway” Needless to say, he didn’t thrill me.
WolfyStyles: When we first spoke on the phone, what was it that caused our conversation to flow so well and naturally?
FantasyWriter: I haven’t the slightest idea. You obviously had a great sense of humor and confidence (which is always a plus when encountering guys) and were very understanding of the fact that I was already in a relationship. You didn’t push me for any information, I just seemed to volunteer it up. Whenever I discussed something that bothered me, you listened and gave your opinion. You acted like the sort of guy I’m into (the nice guy, not the asshole you played at one point).
WolfyStyles: If I remember we talked for around an hour and half online before moving to a four hour conversation on the phone. What was the driving force to stay on the phone?
FantasyWriter: You seemed trustworthy. You didn’t seem to make snap judgments about what I said or did. You also pointed out some things about my relationship that I hadn’t thought of before (granted, they made me paranoid when I next saw my boyfriend but all’s well that ends well). You called me a dork and geek a lot but, that’s not a big deal to me since I don’t take such words to be insults. I’m proud of being a dork. Anyway, I felt I could open up to you and I’d get back a straight response, not one skewed by lust.
WolfyStyles: I knew you were not attracted to muscular men, yet I chose to wear a tight very revealing tank top. This was to basically show that looks do not matter in attraction. What was your first impression when you saw me get out of the car?
FantasyWriter: “Oh crap, what sort of person did I just agree to meet?” You made me think of the sorts of people I despised in high school. I still figured that since I put so much trust in you, in other words, revealed so much to you, that I should give you a chance to redeem your jock-y appearance. I kind of can’t believe you did that to make a point. Not sure how I feel about that.
WolfyStyles: You knew from the beginning I was a pickup artist, what effect did this have on us meeting?
FantasyWriter: Well you revealed a few of your tricks to me on the phone so I felt I had the upper hand. I had a bit of an idea of what to expect from you (granted, not as much as I do now). I was very much on edge when I saw you dressed as you were combined with the stereotypical mental image one has of a pickup artist (sleezeball in a bar trying to get laid), led me to wonder if I had just walked into a trap. (*cue Admiral Ackbar* For those of you who just thought that phrase, you need to go outside more.)
WolfyStyles: When we did meet how did that change especially with you knowing how I go about things?
FantasyWriter: It took a while for me to understand you weren’t solely doing this as a way to get laid, though you did brag about how you could if you wanted to. I do feel more comfortable around you but at the same time, I’m still kind of on edge around you because I’m never sure if you’re going to accidentally run game on me even though you’ve said you wouldn’t do so.
WolfyStyles: When you knew I was using canned routines, like the hand touch routine that just went over horribly, what do you think was going on? (Post interview edit: The routine I am speaking of the comfort routine that has been made very popular of the years. This is where you hold your hands out and as the girl to her hands of top of yours. Then move and see if they do this)
FantastyWriter- I hadn’t the slightest idea what you wanted to happen with that routine so when you told me to put my hands on top of yours, I did that… then proceeded to keep them stable and not move them with yours. (Btw, I used that routine on someone else and it made me laugh) All I knew afterward was you were surprised and cursing a bit in a amazement at how epically that failed. That’s pretty much it except now when you ask me to do something, I instantly wonder what it is, why you’re doing it, and how can I mess it up.
WolfyStyles: When we were flirting back in forth while we were sitting on the couch what parts do you remember raising your attraction?
FantasyWriter: I actually don’t remember much about that night other than I kept using the animals (I was pet sitting at the time) as distractions to keep you from going through with whatever your PUA mind was saying to do. I do remember thinking, “The jock/asshole thing is a front. He’s semi-redeemed himself.” I do also remember you kept trying to get me to sit by you on the couch and would scoot nearer to me when I did. Maybe it was the whole, “Come here” thing but I was just like, “It wouldn’t take all that much for him to kiss me.”
WolfyStyles: What do you remember about pushing me away? (There were multiple times where she froze me out)
FantasyWriter: The fact I wasn’t exactly doing something smart caught up with me and that’s a main part of the reason I decided to pull back from you that night. I had just invited a stranger over to a house that wasn’t mine to hang out. I’m still not entirely sure what made me think that was a good idea.
WolfyStyles: When I used the kissing gambit what was going through your mind? For those that don’t know, it was “you want to kiss me don’t you”
FantasyWriter: I am not turned on, I am not turned on. Mmm, warm boy. Oh damn, I am turned on.
WolfyStyles: Your response if I remember was “how did you know?” At what point prior to that did you want to kiss me?
FantasyWriter: I haven’t the slightest idea, honest.
WolfyStyles: There was a point when your attraction level dropped with me that night. You told me that we would only be friends. As you know I believe attraction can be raised and lowered. What was it that caused you to kiss me again and be attracted?
FantasyWriter: You’re trustworthy and I have a tendency to overreact to things and blow them out of proportion. I knew this and decided that maybe I should take a deep breath and try things again, see if my mind went to the same result or if I really was just overreacting and being paranoid.
WolfyStyles: When we went to the bedroom and I feel we both had things in mind. Now at that point I felt it should not go anywhere because I honestly felt you were not ready for that. I believe the real alpha knows when to say no. What were you thinking when I did not escalate for sex?
FantasyWriter: Part of me was sad (thank you libido) but given the emotional state I was in shortly after that, I was glad you weren’t pushing it.
WolfyStyles: How do you feel now?
FantasyWriter: Grateful. Thank you for not pushing and for choosing to do what you did. I can only imagine what would have happened if things had progressed further and I have a feeling it would not have been good.
WolfyStyles: You got upset over some issues I will not post for the interview dealing with relationships. When I entirely stopped all kissing and romantic touch out of concern for you while we in the bedroom and we just spoke, how did that make you feel then and now?
FantasyWriter: I was glad I had someone to vent to and someone who just listened and gave me hugs to make me feel better. It’s not always easy to talk things over with your significant other so talking it over with someone else first so you can bounce ideas off and see what they think. My perspective on that hasn’t changed at all since then.
WolfyStyles: That night you made a sexual comment to me I was leaving that I took could have been an invite for sexual things. When I decided not to take it and leave what was going through your mind?
FantasyWriter: Umm… I may be mischievous but I’m not quite that devious lol. It wasn’t an offer of sex. It was just an offhand comment made… to see if you’d react. You did and I laughed thinking, “Get them interested them leave them to hang.” 
Maybe I am that devious after all.
Now some questions unrelated to our first meeting.
WolfyStyles: What are your opinions of the average pickup artists?
FantastyWriter: “If you’re gonna use that line, you better not start” seems to fit it pretty well (please, no comments on the reference of the line). I haven’t really encountered any PUAs other than yourself and another guy who has no idea what he’s doing (other than being his natural self) and has a ton of numbers from girls. I’ve already described what the stereotypical PUA is according to society and you can make your own conclusions on that based off of the wording I used.
WolfyStyles: Now how I view and teach pickup how do you feel about that?
FantasyWriter: After you explained to me that you’re teaching guys to be more assertive and not so they can get laid (and that you immediately refuse to teach someone who will use what they learn for that), I had no problem whatsoever. There are a lot of guys out there who don’t have a lot of confidence when it comes to girls (and vice versa. Case in point, myself) so I actually feel you’re doing a lot of good with this (though I am curious to read this blog of yours).
WolfyStyles: With my methods on alpha mentality and how I view attraction do you think I am doing men and woman a service? If so, how?
FantasyWriter: You’re Hitch (again, no comments please) and you’re teaching guys to be themselves around girls and more confident about it. Once they’re comfortable with the openers, it’s not that difficult for them to continue a conversation with someone (or on the off-chance there’s someone who doesn’t want to talk to you, it makes it easier in a way to approach other girls). Awkward silences don’t kill a conversation, at least in my experience.
WolfyStyles: Any closing responses you want to make.
FantasyWriter: Once you’re confident in a pattern or two and you go to use them, that confidence is apparent and it will engage others and keep them interested.
Btw, “Nice shoes, wanna fuck?” is not a suitable pickup line/conversation starter unless you want to have a conversation about how much force a girl can put into a swing of her arm.
Tags: Wolfystyles
